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Been a downhill for quite sometime January 4, 2011

Posted by itsmeaditya in Uncategorized.

Listening to amazing by Aerosmith. Nice song. This song has one phrase ‘there were times in my life when i was going insane’, well it’s happening with me now. It has been a downhill for me, for more like a year. These days somehow, i am becoming emotionally null. Had been a long time, since i had a nice heartful laugh. Got daily sitcoms and south park of course that has made me laugh, but you know that laugh, that surges from your heart to your mouth, making your lips wide and eyes squint, it has been ages. My brother Hari, well his autism comes up in various forms, that some times make my smile and sometimes make me think, what he is going to do, how would he do it. Life, so uncertain. I have started to get paranoid again, about family, my self. I usually imagine my self in a situation where i have lost everything, and then there comes one point where i cant imagine more, and then thats the point, which brings up some hope inside me. I am updating my blog after a long time. I am just writing whatever is coming up in my mind, lately i have been having a lot of fights. Pulkit told me that i got hell lot of crap inside my brain, and i guess he is right. He told me to meditate, but then hey its me Aditya, the procrastinator, thinking of studying for long hours, but they all just remain a thought. Anyway, the last few days, i have not been well, since the outing i had with a few of my friends to CP, i got ill, my stomach hasnt been so well, maybe that can be the reason of this depression, also its not just about my health, its about everything. I have a huge interest in gaming, especially FPS gaming. So there is this game called warrock, really interesting, i was some how good in it, but these last days, downhill, that was something, that gave me some kind of satisfaction, some kind of happiness what so ever, but no, it never happens. I just hope that something happens, i wake up tomorrow, and study for 6 hours atleast(well thats tough, but i got to do it). I met this girl, on my coaching class, and man she was something. Perfect in everything, and then i started thinking what exactly went wrong with me, finally i realized its just not you. Sometimes its never your mistake, you have to go wrong, you  have to take shit, you have to atleast be in an abyss, to shoot out like a star. I dont know if this is going to be true in my case or not. My dad, well he is not supportive at all, well i am glad i didnt get any of the behavioral  traits of him, i am happy. Mom has been really supportive, and my brother Hari is always there, sometimes i just  imagine, what if he was a normal boy, how my life would have turned out. I am happy Hari is  my brother. :]

It feels good to write things out. http://www.collegehumor.com [this site is one site which has kept me going, i love it] and i love south park creators , they did an awesome job. I love parodys. All my posts were related to something or the another but this one is just about me, so i dont think many of the readers would like it, it doesnt matter does it. I have just poured out my feelings. I actually got no one to talk to, so i am doing this. This whole post, is in a disorganized manner[just like me]. Well its great i poured something out, so much is left inside, i seriously want to get into Shaheed Sukhdev College of Business Studies. This is one thing that could change my life forever. I am really psyched about it, hope it all goes well. I am working hard, hope it pays off.

Adios amigos ! will post regularly from now on.

PS : Aliens read my blog 😛

Aditya [Temp noob]



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